A Nerd Poemby Jaymie Minarich
A nerd? Wow. That’s original.
Is it because I prefer my experiences digital?
Yeah, I don’t mean to brag, but I’m a Pokémon Master.
Me and my team of six cause wide spread disaster.
And maybe I can’t tell you who’s Miley Cyrus’s boo,
But I can marathon seven straight seasons of Doctor Who.
I can tell you where Lichtenstein is on a map,
But I could never sit through any chick flick sap.
I could give you a crash course on quarks and photons
And lecture you all about the importance of the Higgs Boson.
I’ve journeyed with consulting detectives, Hobbits, and witches,
And I’ve played tag-along with Hunters who give demons stitches.
I’ve lived a thousand lives in a thousand tales,
And I can tell you right now that the real world pales.
Seriously, how can you put up with this?
Just playing basketball and watching the net swish?
It just seems so boring, truth be told.
I’d rather play Quidditch with snitches of gold.
And so what if I’m not athletic? What does it matter?
All you do is sit in the stands and shout, “SWING! Batter, batter!”
You belittle me for not being able to publically speak.
Well I’m terribly sorry, I’m just a small geek!
But that means so much more than wearing a pocket protector.
It’s about passion, intelligence, and sticking together.
They call us poindexters and weirdoes, which might be true,
But think of all the awesome things us nerds can do!
We’ve cured diseases, made countless vaccines,
Invented the light bulb, the Internet, and everything in between.
So why should I be offended when you call me a social outcast?
Maybe I like to pay attention and not talk in class.
I recommend being nice to me, because when the world ends,
I’ll be in my zombie bunker chilling with my friends.
Sure, I could invite you if I’m feeling nice.
But it’s time to realize not all nerds are sugar and spice.
This next part is for everyone. Yes, you too.
Just be nice to people; it’s not hard to do.
Don’t make fun of people who are different—that’s not cool.
You’re not impressing anyone—you look like a tool.
Don’t be that jerk that everyone avoids;
You know who I’m talking about; all they do is make noise.
I guess what I’m saying is, being a nerd is not a bad thing.
It’s so awesome and precious, just like the Ring.
Well, that wraps up everything I wanted to say.
So long. Take care. DFTBA.